I lost my battle today…

Today I cried…

I lost my temper with my kids for the dozenth time.

I thought about how my one year old used to be happy and now he’s miserable every month usually from a new ear infection.

So here we are at the doctor’s office again.

Hopefully for a good reason.

I want my happy baby back.

I want my three year old to not scream at me every time he drops something.

I unrealistically want my six year old to act like an adult.

I yelled too much.

I cussed too.

More things were pulled out than put away.

I wasn’t patient.

The baby screamed the whole time he was in the bath even though it’s normally his favorite time of day.

I tried to be kind.

My toddler threw a glass marble and broke it in a fit of rage then pulled the trash over to try and get it back.

I tried to listen, hug, and hold.

My six year old asked why he couldn’t keep his dirty blanket out of the laundry after leaving it on the floor all day.

There’s so much change going on I’m overwhelmed.

But so are they.

I lost my battle today.

With my kids and myself.

Maybe tomorrow will be better.

Maybe it won’t.

Bad days happen.

It will get better though.

They say right when you’re ready to give up is when miracles happen.

So I’ll hang on.

Keep trying mama.

Even though I lost my battle today.

I’ll keep trying.

If you’re anything like me, you’re not alone.

Hang in there mama.

Xoxo, Caarin

Caarin Torsitano

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